Lightning Will Strike Pats

I have to give props to the Boise State Broncos for the most exciting moments in football for a long time. Imagine an old black and white football film from the 50s, the Boise St. players with their perfect hair listening to the coach on the sideline. “We’ve run the fumblerooski. And we’ve run the hook and lateral.” The coach is pacing. “Now we need a play to get this two point conversion.” Silence. Then, little Frankie pipes up. “Hey coach, they’ve never seen the Statue of Liberty play, have they?” The coach is puzzled, then his wrinkled brow melts into a mischievous grin. “The ol’ Statue of Liberty….”

Three brilliant trick plays in one game, all of which resulted in scores and all of which left the Oklahoma Sooners looking flat footed and stooge-like. Climaxing in the most perfect Statue of Liberty, the ball magically hidden behind Boise QB Jared Zabransky’s back after the “follow through” of his fake throw, grabbed by the RB for an easy walk to the endzone and a game winning 2-point conversion. The tricks provided a larger than life, courageous, nothing-to-lose victory which allowed the lowly Smurfturfers to capture the hearts and fancy of a nation. May the NFL deliver a fraction of that excitement this weekend.

In the words of Edgar Allan Poe’s The Raven: “Some late visitor entreating entrance at my chamber door; - This it is, and nothing more.” The Colts will be nothing more than a visitor scraping at the door of their abandoned city of Baltimore, and will be rebuffed by McNair and Co. The Colts fled their native Baltimore in a fleet of trucks loaded in secrecy, under cover of night, and were already in Indianapolis by the time anyone noticed. Now its time for the good people of Baltimore to savor some revenge. Ravens 27-Colts 21.

Philadelphia fans consider themselves “long suffering.” Go to a Phillies game in your Mets gear and you’ll quickly find the fans will gladly take out their suffering on you. Nawlins has suffered too, in life not sports and in a much more meaningful sense. They also have only won one playoff game ever. What gives? The rules of karma say the Phila underdog card gets trumped in the Big Easy by the strong arm and leadership of Drew Breezy, and a crowd that will be off the heezy. Saints 34-Eagles 27.

All the talk about New England is about the intangibles, the x-factors, the Brady factor, the Belichick factor, the Brady playoff record, the Brady sex appeal, the Belichick playoff record. Everything except the actual X’s and O’s. A few years ago Brady got his first playoff victory in the swirling snow, with a “tuck rule” call that robbed Da Raiduhs. Sunday, the streak of good luck will end, and Cali gets its revenge. La Danian lightning will strike the Pats, and QB Philip Rivers will be good enough. Brady can go back to complaining about the Deion Branch trade after they fall to earth. Chargers 40-Patriots 31.

The long layoff is not good for the Bears. Too much time to contemplate. The layoff wasn’t long enough to bring the return of two of their defensive stalwarts, Mike Brown and Tommie Harris. Rex Grossman will try “extra hard” and that right there will doom the Bears. Seahawks meanwhile, have some mojo working after the way they defeated Dallas. Seahawks 20 - Bears 17.